Living Through the Pain: The Lonely Me by Cathy A. Kurtz
“Don’t be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God’s place for you. Live and obey and love and believe right there.”
Cathy lost her parents and older brother in a plane crash when she was only sixteen years old; her memoir opens with a short story she wrote one year after the accident, which drew the attention of literary award-granting groups from around the country. In the blink of an eye, Cathy is left with only her sullen and withdrawn brother, Kerry, who copes with their parents’ death by feeding his growing alcohol and drug addictions, and whom Cathy later discovers is harboring a terrible burden of his own. Throughout the chaos left by her parents’ sudden departure from her life, Cathy endures a painfully restrictive and dehumanizing relationship with a young man from high school which continues into college and eventually results in the couple’s marriage and the birth of Cathy’s son, Nick. Several tortuous years pass and Cathy finally summons the courage to leave her husband, though the divorce itself is long and tortuous, and only made worse by the interference of Cathy’s brother, who seeks to hurt his younger sister’s reputation out of misplaced spite. Believe it or not, though, Cathy’s life takes an unexpectedly positive turn, and she is able to find true happiness with a patient, warm-hearted man after moving to California with her young son.
This remarkable memoir is a must-read for anyone dealing with life’s hurdles and struggles. It reminds us (like the above quote) that one must live in the moment, neither dwelling on the pains of one’s past, nor worrying about the obstacles hidden in one’s future. While we may not ever understand why terrible things happen to good people, it’s comforting to think that there is an overarching plan for the world we live in and a purpose in life for every single person that walks the planet. No matter your stance on religion, Kurtz’s memoir, entitled “Living Through the Pain: The Lonely Me,” offers readers terrific advice. At its heart, this is a story about taking control of your own life when things have long spiraled away from you. After spending her whole life wondering why certain things had happened to her, Cathy discovers that the most important thing in life isn’t having understanding – it’s having the patience to let the truth reveal itself in its own time.
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